Controlled crying? Parental presence? Co-sleeping?
Which way to go to settle a baby?
If you're already a mum, which way worked for you?
For my husband and I, it was mostly a bit of a blur settling our baby twins, but I do know that we held sacred one thing, and one thing only: routine. Oh, and teamwork. Okay, that's two.
Another thing is certain: newborns cry. And cry. And bawl. And scream. In a pitch you've never heard. And in a way that grates and distresses and upsets you like nothing you've ever experienced.
And sometimes, babies just can't indicate what is wrong with them despite what experts tell you, encouraging you to look out for the kind of cry they have, or a look on their face. In the midst of a monster bawl (yours and theirs), you are often too distressed to look for 'the signs.'
You may be well-prepped, fully read-up, and watched all the DVDs you can get your hands on, but sometimes... they just... Scream. LOUDLY. And no theory will work. And then... it passes.
The people you'd most likely turn to are your mum, sister, best mummy friend, early childhood nurse, books, DVDs, websites, and other real-time help from the sensational organisations Karitane and Tresillian.
According to a newspaper article, these two parent-support organisations have abandoned their stance of controlled crying to settle a baby, and instead have adopted a new view on how to settle a bub, called "parental presence" which involves setting up a bed in the baby's room, and making a gesture or coughing so they know you are there, and they go back to sleep.
You can read the article here:
For us, we had two bassinettes in our room until they were almost six months. They then moved to their cots in another room. I could not do controlled crying... it just did not appeal to me at all.
Whilst I did not leap up every time they cried, as I wanted them to try and learn how to self-soothe, I certainly could not leave them to be distressed for more than a few minutes.
What worked for you? Or, if you are pregnant, what will you do?
Feel free to comment.