Choosing the sex of your baby

Tonight, 60 Minutes [Australia] will broadcast an interview with a family who had seven boys and desperately wanted a girl.

With gender selection against the law in Australia, couples who wish to have a particular gender baby must head overseas.

See a brief backgrounder of tonight's story here:

http://sixtyminutes.ninemsn.com.au/article.aspx?id=8443410

I have written on the topic before - for The Punch - and still stand firm on the issue: I wholeheartedly agree that a couple should have the right to choose the sex of their baby.

I know it's controversial, I know many disagree, and I know that many will include China's one child policy, those who are infertile, and "playing God" in their arguments.

I still stand firm.

My argument always goes along these lines: unless you are going through it, what gives you the right to decide what a couple does to create their family? Does anyone dictate your decisions?

Read my article in The Punch here:

http://www.thepunch.com.au/articles/choosing-a-babys-sex-the-next-great-leap-for-parents/

And please comment on what you think: choosing the sex of your baby - agree or disagree?

Jessica Alba: Parenting magazine, April 2012

Such a lovely montage of beautiful pics featuring Jessica Alba's two daughters, Honor Marie and Haven Garner grace the latest issue of US Parenting magazine.

So very cute!

She says of her parenting style: "“I’m the disciplinarian. I think it’s because I was kind of a naughty kid myself: I’d push my parents’ buttons and test them to see how much I could get away with. Cash, meanwhile, was always the perfect kid – the straight-A student who was everyone’s sweetheart. It was never in him to be naughty,” she says.

She adds: “I think I just know, from me being that other kind of child, how to cut off bad behavior and redirect it. So when Honor tries to do something she shouldn’t, I have to say to Cash, ‘Let her know right from the beginning that she can’t.’ I’ll put her in time-out and tell her, ‘Think about the choices you’ve made.’ Then I’ll come back and say, ‘Now its time to stop crying and think.’ Then I’ll come back again and ask her, ‘Now, what did you learn?’”

Alba also talks about her new company, called The Honest Company.

For more, see: http://www.honest.com/

And for more on the Parenting magazine article - plus a fab behind the scenes clip - go here: http://www.parenting.com/jessica-alba-kids

Jessica Simpson: pregnant and naked on Elle cover

Jessica Simpson has posed sans a stitch of clothing (but some pretty fabulous jewellery) on the cover of US Elle magazine's April issue.

She has followed in the footsteps of Demi Moore, Miranda Kerr, Cindy Crawford, and Britney Spears, who have all taken their kit off and posed the exact same way for magazine around the world.

The blonde bombshell - who seems to have been pregnant forever - she didn't reveal her due date in the magazine interview, though she did reveal the baby's gender. She's having a girl.

"I swear, I will croak if she asks me for a pair of Nikes instead of Christian Louboutins!” Simpson told Elle magazine. “Eric is so athletic. We’re gonna have this athletic girl and I won’t even be able to take her shopping, ‘cause all she’s gonna want is sports bras and Nikes!”

Baby names? Though she admits it’s a “non-traditional” choice, she says it’s nothing shocking and nothing you’ll have to add to the dictionary. When people hear it, they’ll know… why.”

There is also a second cover where she dons a red dress, showing off her lovely baby bump.

Which cover do you prefer?

For more, see: http://www.elle.com/Pop-Culture/Cover-Shoots/Jessica-Simpson-Billion-Dollar-Baby

(Photos: courtesy Elle magazine).

Beyond The Sling: Mayim Bialik on attachment parenting

I started to half-watch a segment with actress Mayim Bialik (you know, the Bette Midler mini-me from 'Beaches') on 'The View' with nonchalance today.

Hmmm, another actress on another talk show, plugging herself. (Ouch... painful! You know what I mean: on the PR trail. Again).

But no, this was different.

When I heard Mayim had written a parenting book, I thought, sure, I'll listen. When I saw she'd completed a PhD in neuroscience and was an advocate for attachment parenting, I thought, yes: I want to know more.

The clip from 'The View' is still to be uploaded here - the links I have found so far cannot be viewed in Australia - but I did find an excellent clip from US ABC News, also from the past 24 hours.

In it, Mayim explains how and why she believes in attachment parenting.

Attachment parenting involves these elements: co-sleeping until the child grows out of it, feeding [breast] on demand and for as long as possible (Mayim is still breastfeeding her second son, who is 3; her eldest is 6). And no baby formula.

It also involves 'elimination communication', which mean no nappies. Ever. That's right, from the moment they are born, parents need to learn their baby's cues for when they need to wee or poo.

Watch the clip, and comment below on your thoughts:

Does this style of parenting resonate with you? Have you taken various elements of it and adapted it to your own life? Or none at all?

For me: toilet training has been done based on the child's agenda.

Feeding on demand happened sometimes - and only as newborns. I breastfed for as long as possible (almost six months but alternated with the bottle as I had two babies to feed. And you can't mess with screaming, hungry twins and two boobs that aren't producing as much milk as you'd like).

And we never, ever have our children in our bed.

Okay, there have been transient visits to our bed, which have lasted all of ten minutes, and this has only been when they were inconsolable. In over four years, I can count these occasions on one hand.

My husband has been deadset against co-sleeping from day one, and I am very glad to have stuck to this parenting rule, too. Today, nobody comes to our bed in the middle of the night and wants to hop in.

We need our own space sometimes, you know.

Share your thoughts here. What has/is working for you?

The 'Sex Talk' for kids: how soon to start?

A few months ago, I wrote a piece for the Mamamia site.

It centred on how soon to have the 'sex talk' with kids.

After a friend posted on Facebook that her six year old son had asked: "Mummy, I know a baby is made from sperm and an egg but how does the man give the woman his sperm?" I knew I wanted to re-read the piece.

No doubt I will be needing the tips in a year or two.

Here is an excerpt:

First, I started with the big one: the birds and the bees for toddlers. How on earth do I start?

“Give them the language they need to talk about their bodies and about where babies come from.When they are learning the names of body parts, include ‘penis’ and ‘testicles’ (or ‘balls’). With girls, many parents are most comfortable starting with a general “bottom” to indicate the whole nether area, but “vagina’ and/or “vulva” should be added well before starting school. I’d suggest that by age 3½ – or whenever the child is asking questions about the genitals – start using more definite, and correct, words. Both boys and girls need the names for the sex organs of both sexes.”

Gulp. I have been trying to incorporate that into my conversations with my daughter of late. I will admit I do flinch a little when I hear myself say: “Oh, that…? That is your vagina.”

“When your children have the names for penis and vagina – and know where they are located – when the questions start about where babies come from half your work is already done,” adds Dr Gelin, who suggests intro-ing that topic by the time they’re in first grade if they haven’t already done so. Although it’s very likely that by then they’d probably have talked about their penis while with you in the bank queue. When it’s quiet. Adding that they think they’ve just peed their pants. And as your face burns, you try desperately to ignore the muffled laughter.'

You can read the rest of my story here: http://www.mamamia.com.au/parenting/kids-and-sex-when-is-the-right-time-to-have-the-talk/

Question is: when do you think is the right age for the sex talk? And what will you say?

Share!

Dumping kids at play centres - the new 'babysitting trend'

My mouth is agape here... are parents really doing this?

Leaving kids unattended at leisure and play centres and taking off to, I don't know, run errands, see a doctor, get nails done, have a latte?

The Herald Sun has reported that child safety commissioner Bernie Geary is 'condemning' parents for dumping kids at these venues and doing the Harry Holt (the bolt, a runner).

"It is dangerous to children and disrespectful to the people who run these facilities," says Geary.

The Herald Sun reports this is the result of parents wanting to avoid daycare costs. I think it is in fact parents having no alternative on a day they have "stuff to do" and in a moment of desperation [and complete madness] they leave them at a place where they think nobody will notice, and their kids will blend into the crowd.

I try and 'do parenting' with the following credo - never say never. That is, I try to never start a smug parenting statement with: "I would never do that to my child", because chances are, things change and maybe I will.

In this instance, I can categorically say that "I would never do that."

Seriously? Leaving kids anywhere unattended? Complete madness.

Have you heard of someone pulling this? Go on, spill.

To read more, go here:

http://www.heraldsun.com.au/opinion/editorials/dont-dump-kids-in-the-deep-end/story-e6frfhqo-1226246802237

Jay-Z's song for Blue Ivy Carter, "Glory"

Have you heard the new song "Glory" penned by Jay-Z for his newborn baby girl Blue Ivy Carter?

It's rather sweet, cute, and full of emotion; even l'il Blue features, having a cry at around 3.20 mark. Listen:

The couple have just released a statement to US Weekly magazine:

Hello Hello Baby Blue! We are happy to announce the arrival of our beautiful daughter, Blue Ivy Carter, born on Saturday, January 7, 2012. Her birth was emotional and extremely peaceful, we are in heaven.

“She was delivered naturally at a healthy 7lbs and it was the best experience of both our lives. We are thankful to everyone for all your prayers, well wishes, love and support.”

In the song "Glory" Jay-Z reveals his wife Beyonce had suffered miscarriage, with the lyrics:

"Last time the miscarriage was so tragic, was we was afraid you disappeared."

Adding: "...All the pain of the last time, prayed so hard it was the last time."

He also reveals where the bub was conceived:

"You don't yet know what swag is, but you was made in Paris, and mama woke up the next day and mama woke up the next day and shot her album package."

Which kinda made me think: who else has penned a song for their new baby?

Well, there is this one from Fugees singer Lauryn Hill, for her son Zion:

And of course this classic 'Isn't She Lovely' from Stevie Wonder for his newborn baby girl:

And this one from John Lennon called 'Beautiful Boy':

This one, too, by James Taylor called 'Sweet Baby James':

What are your faves? Any I have missed?